April 2 - Weekly Artist Interview - Paige Harley

Paige Harley. - paigeharley.com
Sounds like a motorcycle... that's powered by rockets... and it's got cameras on it, capturing everything, all the time... and there are robot-sharks that shoot lasers from their eyes attached to it... and there's probably a couple rainbows that follow it around wherever it goes too.
That sounds fun.
That sounds like something I'd like to ride.

Steige: Is your name made up? It sounds made up.

Paige Harley: You bet it’s made up! Wouldn’t you be jealous though if it wasn’t? The person that made it up gave it to me on the condition that it sounded like a rock star name, and I had to live up to it… being a photard kinda stomped that dream.

Steige: I don't believe you....
Forget the rule of thirds, I want to know about the rule of fifths! (A fifth is one fifth of a quart of alcohol, or a two-six for the cheese heads out there, but calling it a two-six kinda ruins the joke... much like explaining the joke.) Back to the rule of fifths... what's your favorite drink, and how many of those would I have to buy you before you'd drop your guard and let me take advantage of you?

PH: I’m such a beer victim. After being in Ireland I’ve developed an unquenchable thirst for Guinness. I try not to drink too much of it thought cuz it’s like a turkey dinner in a can. Usually I just stick to vodka waters. Take advantage?? Flatterer.

S: What has been the best or worst or craziest shoot of your career so far? Why?

PH: I’m not sure if I would call it a career. A failing attempt to love your job maybe….. The craziest shoot of my life was with guitar extraordinaire Barry Jones. He needed an album cover so we went for a walk in downtown Vancouver with the idea of some interesting candids. We ended up scaling the outside of a 30 story apartment building that was under construction. We took nude shots of Barry and his guitar. His feet were dangling over the edge, and the traffic way down below made crazy light trails.
Getting a group of boys to take off all their clothes while leaving one in a banana costume is always fun too.

S: You shoot both film and digi. What do you tell the filmophiles that say digital is for chumps, and will never reach the quality of film? What do you tell the new school cats that tell you to get a digi, and step into the 90's?

PH: Oh man! Filmophiles is my new favorite word! You may have just killed photards. If I could afford to shoot nothing but film, I would. But digital allows me to screw up….lots. So to the wonderful filmophiles I say “take me with you!!!!!”. And to the new school digi whores I say “screw you and Canon sucks.”

S: Pff, whatever. My Canon could totally out-face-detect your Pentax any day....
"I love your stuff! I bought one of your photos at your last exhibit, and it totally completes the room I put it in! You should come by sometime and check it out!" Does that ever work? If so, I, uh, just bought one of your photos, and...

PH: That line is sooooo lame. Especially since I’ve never had an exhibit…yet (grad show coming up! www.langaraphotograds.com ) That would make the person a liar! I would, however, be totally impressed if someone went to all the effort to steal one of my photos and print it off themselves. Waaaay more effort.

S: You know there's going to be houses full of your stolen-from-facebook photos now, right? If you were a Ninja Turtle, which one would you be, and why?

PH: Michelangelo is by far my favorite. I feel so close to him I’m just gonna call him Mikey. He looks great in orange plus he has the best sense of humor of the dole. Plus nunchuks????? Hands down, I’d be Mikey.

S: Earth, Fire, Wind, Water, and _______.

PH: Pentax!

S: You're cute.

PH: I can’t believe how unprofessional you are!!!!!!! I am a human being! Not an object to be gawked at!

S: Right.... Anything else you want to say?

PH: You're cute.

















If you enjoyed this make sure to check out the Interview With Ali Milner that Paige took the photos for, as well as an Interview With Josh Martinez, which has nothing at all to do with Paige, but it still rules. Don't feel like reading? Check out these Horrible Album Covers. And make sure to drop by PaigeHarley.com to see more amazing photos by the multi-talented, incredibly attractive, Paige Harley.

Mar. 26 - Weekly Artist Interview - Weez 1

Weez1 ft. Animal Nation - SADD
from upcoming album: "Separation Anxiety"


Weez 1 isn't 50 Cent. Which makes perfect sense, because 50 Cent is 50 Cent, and as far as I know, it's impossible for two people to be one person. That being said, I don't really know all that much, in relation to the amount of stuff that can be known, so who knows... maybe Weez 1 is 50 Cent. Actually, I'm going to go out on a limb and say that yes, Weez 1 is unquestionably and absolutely 50 Cent. Weez 1 is the white-kid-gutter-punk-split-ya-vocals-through-5-guitar-amps-and-your-grandma's-hearing-aid version of 50 Cent. Weez 1 is the I-write-better-lyrics-than-you-in-my-sleep version of 50 Cent. Weez 1 is the ya-best-hold-off-on-all-that-Kool-Aid-if-ya-wanna-have-any-brain-cells-left-over-to-raise-yo'-baby version of 50 Cent.
...Wait, what?


Steige: If the sky wasn't blue, what color would it be, and why?

Weez1: Argyle... I used to wear argyle socks with my shorts when i was just a lil' whippersnapper... I thought I was hip... That's what I get for thinking... So the sky would be a constant reminder of how un-hip i really was then... Now I wear tie dye socks... I'm so hip. Right on.

S: What do you do with your anger?

W: ...I plant it in my backyard until it grows into a sarcasm tree... and use the the leaves as garnish for my knuckle sandwiches....

S: Amazing. Do you have any cats? How many cats does someone have to have before they're considered "a crazy cat person"?

W: ...One cat, all black, his name is Lil' Nig... somebody is gonna take that the wrong way... I guess its a good thing that I don't care... He always hangs out with me in the "studio"... He is such a critic!!..."Talk louder Weez, enunciate your words Weez, why do you have a saved by the bell poster on you wall Weez??" ...Part 2: No comment, don't judge me!!!

S: If SADD was an acronym, what would it stand for, and why? Ps. Make it as happy as possible for extra points!

W: HAPPY!!? ...come on now, you have heard my music before right? ...Ummm, lets see... I'll have to make something up real quick... S.loppy A.nal... no that's no good... S.pank A. D.irty D.ame... nahhhhh, 'SADD' is the name of a track on my upcoming new album... S.urviving A. D.ark D.epression... S.imple A.s D.eath D.ude.... On a side note, my friend Eddie told me he thinks 'dude' is a racial slur towards honkeys.... Cheese and crackers!!!!! Whooooooooo!!!!

S: How did you get the name Weez? Do you smoke too much? If it's a boring story, make up something fun... about being on fire.

W: My first name is not Wayne... Ok, let me make a short story longer.... I moved to town... didn't have many friends... I was a lil' skater 'dude' with cut up shorts and argyle socks (super cool)... Maybe 13 or 14... Anyways, I would go skating at the local waxed curb... I didn't talk to nobody tho... all I did was roll around and whistle... so after a while I became known as the Whistler... which over time changed to the Weezler... which was shortened to Weez! ...Altho I do smoke to much. Ohhh the irony!!

S: Wait, wait, wait... if you "didn't talk to nobody", does that mean that you talked to everybody? Which CD would people be most surprised to learn that you own?

W: TV Land Presents Favorite TV Theme Songs Soundtrack CD.... What? Is that weird?...Don't act like you don't have it! ...You guys are lying to yourselves!!!!!

S: When the creators of the Simpsons created Itchy and Scratchy, do you think that they said "Let's just make them Tom and Jerry, times a thousand, with bombs." Or do you think they said "Let's make a cat and mouse version of The Road Runner and Coyote, but let's use more bombs..."?

W: The Itchy and Scratchy concept is actually a social commentary on the symbiotic relationship of Deep-Sea Pompeii worms and thermophilic bacteria ...Come on 'dude' everybody knows that!!!

S: Whoa. Goin' deep! Like some Deep-Sea Pompeii worms! Or a halibut!
Anyway... vocal effects. Yours. Love 'em. Analog or digital?

W: First of all, let me say thanks!! You really know how to butter my biscuit.... I like to run my vox through different guitar amps I have laying around, and other instrument effects... just to experiment with the different sounds.... Sometimes you've just got to Weez It Out(patent pending).... A little bit country, a little bit rock n roll....

S: Tell me the greatest thing ever. Ever.

W: ...The little alien looking thing in my girl's belly.... Is the world ready for weez jr.??

S: Wow! Wow... that's amazing! Congratulations! Did you just give us a little animalnationdoesntknowanything exclusive?
So, besides the whole "growing up, maturing, and having a baby" thing, whats next for Weez1?

W: ...Oh wow, thought you would never ask.... My new album coming soon, entirely produced by Nic & Jaq of Germany..... "Separation Anxiety" is the moniker..... Guest artists include, but are not limited to, Iz-Real, The Red Fox, Gmills, Burt Bacharach, Tweezy, Li'l Nig, and some crazy fools from Canada! I think they're called the Animal Nation... you know who i'm talking aboot??
...Also working on a project produced by Dj Dredi with Iz-Real... under the name WeezReal....
If you don't have my 'Tax the Stereo' album yet you're stupid!! ...or maybe I'm stupid... either way somebody is stupid....
Werd.

S: You heard it here first folks! Weez1 and his lady-friend are the reason for over-population!
But seriously, buy his album! Help him put food in front of his girl! She's eating for two now!
...
...On a side note - What I find funny is that a girl can mis-carry if she doesn't treat her body right... if she's on 'the drug', or not eating properly, if she can't afford food... but the irony of the situation, the part that makes me giggle like a little school-girl, lies in the fact that as soon as she mis-carries she's got all sorts of food to eat!

...What do you mean, "That's not funny"...?


Like this interview?? Make sure to check out our Interview With An Empty Bucket, as well as our Interview With The Incredibly Beautiful and Talented Ali Milner. Don't feel like reading anymore? Check out The Googly Eye Project now!

Mar. 19 - Weekly Artist Interview - Steige Turner of Animal Nation

Chalk it up to laziness, or chalk it up to the fact that we have a new album coming out, or simply call it self indulgence... either way, this week I had the pleasure of asking... myself.. a few questions.
I made sure to cover obvious topics, such as 'why mirrors always look better when I'm in front of them', and 'whether or not I think it's fair that I was made perfect, while everyone else, in comparison, was made to look like mud', as well as issues with a little more depth, such as 'your envy - is it really your fault?'
...
Actually, I know that asking myself questions that I know the answer to could easily turn cheesily, so instead I tried to ask myself questions that I didn't know the answer to, to see if I could maybe learn something new. Check out my myspace to maybe hear a couple songs you've never heard before.

Steige: What first got you into music, and why is it something that you still do?

Steige: I ask myself this question every time we have a bad show, or anytime I spend 2 hours writing something that turns out to be garbage...

Like the 3 paragraph answer I wrote for this, which turned out to be garbage, which I will now shorten to:
I think Napoleon Dynamite put it best when he said "girls like guys with skills". I also like Slug's line, "...before you lose it, and your words get abusive, just remember, I wouldn't be shit without my music."

S: On the track "Her Dangerous Smile" you've got a line that goes something like "You could call me an asshole, and spit in my face, and I'd still be there tomorrow trying to tighten those lips."
...Why are you such a pussy?

S: Hah... uhm.. I had just re-heard the song "Self Esteem" by the Offspring for the first time in a while, and loved how confessional it came off. It's like he's saying, 'being around you isn't fun, but being by myself is worse.' And then he's saying 'screw it, everything sucks, and if everything sucks, then relative to anything else, being with you doesn't suck that bad, so who cares that you're trying to bring me down, I'm already there,' But in a happy-go-lucky college-rock-song kind of way. He's also got those 'Yeahhh, yeahh yeahhhh's' and those heavy guitars in there to try to cover up his self loathing. I think that's sort of what I was going for, but I kinda forgot to add the 'yeah yeah yeah's' and the heavy college rock guitar riffs....

S: Why do you hate food so much?

S: I'd love to eat if I didn't have to do it. Food is rad for being social and having a good time around, and there are some pretty good foods out there, but I hate having to stop what I'm doing because my body's running out of energy. I'm also not a fan of putting a bunch of time into creating something I can't see or feel or hear the next day. I mean, I guess I could vibe with my meal the next day, but that would be kinda gnarly.

Party Animals
S: You originally wrote the song "Paradise's Paradigm" (Smoke off the Hangover, Drink Away the High) when you were 18. Why did you decide to re-record this particular song for the new Animal Nation album, and can you still identify with something you wrote nearly 8 years ago?

S: I can relate to the lyrics more now than I could before! I originally wrote that song about a friend that I grew up with that I sort of parted ways with because his habits were starting to get the best of him, and I couldn't keep up. But lately it seems easier to tie one on, and weed is a great hangover cure. We wanted to put this one on the album because it's always been a crowd favorite. It's great to play live, and we wanted people to be able to have a copy of it to play on their boom boxes back home. It was fun to go back and cut up and re-construct a song I'd made so long ago. There are so many things I can do now that I would have had no idea how to do then, but at the same time I remember, for example, actually creating the wave form, creating a sound out of numbers, for the bass note, which I have absolutely no idea how to do now. It was difficult, and fun, and probably the hardest song to label as 'finished' for the new album.

S: What is your favorite instrument?

S: The harmonica! It's all in one key, so as long as the people around you are playing in that key, no matter what you play it's going to sound good! It's fun and easy, and it reminds me of being a pirate for some reason.

S: Why do you like reading? It's slow and boring and can be really hard work sometimes. And most good books are made into movies with totally kick-ass graphics anyway.

S: I guess I like being able to take my time. When you read something mind blowing you can put the book down, and think about what you've just learned. You can apply it to living, and see how other people take to it. When you're watching it on TV you have the same bits of information, but as soon as you learn one thing the TV has moved on to something else, and my head isn't very good at remembering more than 1 or 2 things at a time. After you get better at reading you can also get really lost in the story. You always see the edges of a TV screen, but when you're reading a good book, and you're not too stoned, you can pretty easily swap realities.

S: Your bio says that your hopes and dreams when you were younger included 'working in Subway'. You also wrote a song called "Watch! (I'll Aim Low)", that went "Watch, I'll aim low, and try even less, so no matter what I do it's considered a success! Listen to the words I speak, I ain't lyin'! The first step to failure is trying!" Is this a joke? Do you actually think this way?

S: Haha, I've never really had high hopes for anything. I think I used to have expectations, but nothing ever plays as you plan, and I've been let down so many times that it's easier to hope for nothing, and roll with whatever comes your way. That being said, it's definitely a joke. I mean, if I actually thought that the first step to failure was trying then I never would have written the song. That song was based on an essay I wrote for my English 12 final exam that was all about wanting to work in a box factory when I grew up, so that no matter what my real job was I wouldn't be disappointed. I wrote it as a joke out of spite because our teacher pushed us so hard to set goals for ourselves. I remember him reading it in front of the class, and telling everyone he thought it was a brilliant piece of satire. Not knowing what satire was, I thought he meant that it was a decent piece of life advice. His encouragement encouraged me not to care about the A that he gave me, and I quickly settled back into my C+ average.

S: What makes you depressed?

S: Down and out people. People that have given up, or people that are trying as hard as they can possibly try but are still being held back. I had to work at a "re-use-it" center a couple years ago, where you go to drop off stuff you don't use anymore, which is then sold for usually really cheap. I remember a dad coming in with his son. They were looking for hockey skates, and his son was overjoyed when they found a nice pair that fit. You could tell that the dad loved his son more than anything in the world, and he's looking at the hope and excitement on his son's face, and it was heart breaking to watch him have to tell his son that they couldn't afford the $45 price tag. All the other pairs were $5 and $10. Why did these ones have to cost as much as a week's worth of groceries? It was like God, if He were real, was saying to them, "Almost! Life's almost fair! Just about! But sorry, once again you have to go home empty handed, save for the disappointment on your son's face." Har-har. Good one, God.

S: Anything else you want to talk about?

S: I was just reading this thing about lags. About the lags in your nervous system, how it takes 1/13th of a second to react to something you've just seen, and lags in social structures and generation gaps, people living according to rules and standards that were created hundreds of years ago. Even the lag that is sight, the fact that it takes time for light to travel from one place to another, and through all these lags people find it hard to live in the present. Like, there is no present, and everything that people consider 'the present' is actually just an unchangable movie of the present that you're forced to watch. We're all stuck watching our lives, and reacting to things that have already happened, and trying to change things that are unchangeable, and I was just thinking how well that fits into the whole "not caring about anything" approach to living, because it's impossible to change the past, and there's no point crying over spilt milk, and the more you just go with it, the less you'll be worrying about your script, and the more you'll start to live in the moment, in "your own reality, and until we can get into our own world, we can't control it. If you ever make that breakthrough, you'll know it. It'll be like you had a player piano, and it is playing a mile a minute, with all the keys sinking in front of you in fantastic chords, and you never heard of the song before, but you are so far into the thing, your hands starts going along with it exactly. When you make that breakthrough, then you'll start controlling the piano--"
I thought that was something.

I also found a pocket watch today. It's got a huge ship on it, and it makes me smile.

S: Right on. Make sure to check out our new album, available for pre-sale now, and available to the digital and analogue public on May 24, 2009. (My birthday!)


Enjoy this? Check out our interview with an Empty 4.25 Gallon Pail with Wire Handle and Lid, or 5 of the Worst Album Covers you'll see all day.