Feb. 5 - Weekly Artist Interview - Ali Milner

If you've heard the clip and you've seen the photo then you don't need to be told that Ali Milner travels with some serious sex appeal. That being said I did my best to keep this interview as PG-13 as I could, to try to show people that the talents of this uber-beauty don't end at her ability to make herself really really good looking.... I mean, questions about girls kissing girls are still considered PG-13 these days, right?

Click over to ALI MILNER's myspace page to listen while you read, or click over to the ANIMAL NATION myspace page to check out the song Ali recorded with us, 'Wooden Roller Coaster', which will be featured on our upcoming album "Understanding More About Nothing Than Anybody Ever Thought Impossible or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Music".

S: Ali, if the sky wasn't blue, what color would it be, and why?

AM: I thiiiink if the sky wasn't blue I'd like it to be pink and orange and yellow, so we could have an everlasting sunset. Wouldn't that be nice? Might get kind of old after a while, but the first week would be so lovely...

S: Do you spell "color" with a 'u'? I think we're supposed to as Canadians, but I always get lazy with it.

AM: I totally spell "colour" with a "u". Big time! I was always ra-ra with all the Canadian spelling because my first and second grade teacher, Ms. Christopher, taught it to us that way. Although, I totally don't when I'm texting because it won't let me and tells me I'm wrong.

S: Yeah! My cell phone is anti-Canada as well! I remember having Ms. Christopher for 2nd grade math! She taught me that it was impossible to subtract a larger number from a smaller number. I guess she was just a very positive person.... What was the weirdest recording experience you've ever had?

AM: Hmmm, weirdest recording experience? Well... I don't know if it's weird, but it was pretty miraculous. Recording my Christmas song was crazy, because we had one day in the studio and we had 7 live instruments to lay down, along with vocals.... Pretty much, we made the impossible possible, and got it all done in a day, and it's probably the best thing I've ever been a part of I'd say, the most proud I've ever been!

S: How do you find the industry treats you as a 'ginger kid'? I find that I get a lot of flack, but that could be easily blamed on my lack of talent.

AM: The industry doesn't seem to mind my (fake) "gingerness", it's sort of a defining feature about myself it seems, something that sticks out in people's minds. I do seem to get a lot of flack from my friends though! I often get youtube links about gingers, and newspaper articles relating to "kick a ginger day"... What's up with that? And your flack must be because of your wonderful hair colour (Canadian spelling) because you got miles of talent, no lies.

S: Aw you make me blush. I think we should start 'redhead redemption day', or maybe just a 'everyone smile at everyone' day. I think that would be nice! If I were to give you a small tub, say 1.5 L, of Neapolitan iced-cream how would you go about eating it? Would you mix the flavours? Go for a particular flavour first? ...And you have no spoon.

AM: So 1.5 L tub of Neapolitan... I definitely have a routine when it comes to Neapolitan ice cream, but your "no spoon" clause really gums up the works here. If I had a spoon, I would start with a couple bites of chocolate and then just go about mixing it all together to make a milkshake-like consistency. That's what I do. But with no spoon? I wouuuuld.... well, this isn't very dignified, but I guess I'd do the same with my hands. Definitely.

S: Hahaha, that's amazing. We definitely need to hang out more. How many times per day do you get told that your name sounds similar to 'Val Kilmer'? Why do you think your parents plotted such conniving trickery against you?

AM: Well, I gotta tell ya, no one has ever mentioned my name sounds like "Val Kilmer". I mean, I guess I see it... but is that really conniving trickery from my folks? He's a well-respected, serious actor right? Right? Batman Forever killed it... right?

S: Haha, ya know, the 12 year old version of me thought that movie was awesome! Then throughout the years I heard how it was actually really horrible, and how it ruined the Batman movies all together! I'd hate to watch it again now and find out that the 12 year old movie buff in me wasn't very buff. Speaking of bats... if you could fly with the assistance of something, what would that something be? (ie - a hover board, that weird dragon dog thing from The Never Ending Story, etc..)

AM: Crap, if I could fly with the assistance of anything it would be my invisible wings that no could see... but that sort of seems like I'm flying without assistance. So, basically, between the hover board, flying dog-dragon from The Never Ending Story, fairy dust, or Kirby's star thingy, I would take any of the above. I reeeeeeeeeally wish I could fly. That's one of my life-long dreams, and lemme tell you, it'll happen one of these days, it'll happen. (And airplanes totally don't count...) Also now that I think of it, Harry Potter's Firebolt's always been really appealing to me....

S: In the likely event that you one day commit mass murder and get sentenced to the electric chair, what would you choose as your last meal?

AM: For my last meal before my electric chair after committing mass murder, I would like tuna and salmon sashimi and a dynamite roll... love that. I would love fries from Splitz Grill, and curry from Connie's Cookhouse in Van. For dessert (the most important part) I would really really really want Mint Chip Hard Yogurt from JP Licks. I would die for Mint Chip Hard Yogurt from JP Licks.

S: I'm told that your dad acts as your manager, which totally freakin' rules. Does it suck, however, that you can't tell your manager "You can't tell me what to do! You're not my dad!!" and storm out of a room?
AM: Yeah, my pa is a dadager... which works out pretty great. In the event that we do get in an argument, I pretty much say "You can't tell me what to do!!" I just leave out the "you're not my dad!!" part.

S: Katy Perry: Smash or Trash? Have you ever kissed a girl and liked it?

AM: Katy Perry = Smash!! At first I was like "blech, who is this girl? what a weirdo"... But I don't know, she's really won me over. Seems like a strong lady who's doing her thing and honestly doesn't really care much what folks think of her. And no, alas, I have not kissed a girl, and cannot say whether I'd like it or not. I'm open to a lot of things, so who knows? Just hasn't happened for me yet. One daaaay!

S: That being said, you're totally not my dad, and I'm friggin' outta here.


If you enjoyed this, make sure to check out our hilarious Interview With Jiminy, or our Interview with Mat the Alien! Don't feel like reading? Check out The Googly Eye Project!

Jan. 29 - Weekly Artist Interview - Mat the Alien

I can only think of one time in the seventeen years I spent living at home that I was ever disciplined for anything.
When I was caught for shoplifting and driven home by the cops my dad let me off with a warning... and let me keep everything I'd stolen. Both times I crashed his car I was told that I'd probably already learned my lesson, and wasn't even made to pay for the damages! Even after he found a pound of weed under my bed he didn't have much of a lecture for me. He did take the weed, and I was out $1800, but it was never really mentioned again.
The only thing I ever did that ever provoked any sort of reaction at all was when my dad walked in on me using his prized Oracle turntable to scratch his even more prized collection of records.
"But they do it on TV!"
WAP!
And then you meet someone like Mat the Alien, someone that scratches records for a living, and you think to yourself, "Man, this guy's parents must have given even less of a crap than my own!"

Steige: Do you still have a soft spot for carrying around a crate
of vinyl, or are you pretty set carrying around 2 Serato
records? What do you say to DJs that think it's whack to
use mp3 based scratch programs such as Serato or Final
Scratch?

Mat the Alien: The digital thing has changed things a lot in the past 4 years. Before this there wasn't the option for playing your own music except for CD's which weren't as good for a turntablist as being on the turntables .

I was carrying around 4 crates to shows and that made traveling difficult. I still buy records as I can't get everything on digital sites at high quality.
I love getting records, 12" and 45's, the dusty old smell, the cover artwork and info available about the people on the record and stuff.

Digital music is more disposable as you don't know as much info about the artist's music that you're playing, but there's lots of music available out there all over the world, so music is more accessible now.

I used to have to dig when i traveled in dusty thrift shops for old funk stuff now you can sit at home and find it online.

I really think if someones good at what they do you can't tell whether they're on turntables, CD's, Abelton, vinyl, banjo.

If someones hung up and bothered with what other people are doing it kind of looks like they're whack and not happy with what they're doing.

If you're happy with what you're doing, and doing what you want to do, and always getting better then I think that's good.

You'll always have purists who want to keep things the same but things wouldn't evolve without people trying new things and taking risks.

Hip-hop started with pioneers like Afrikka Bambaata playing crazy records like rock, disco, funk, and making it into a new sound by looping parts.

Most of the early hip hop records are electronic music made with drum machines, like planet rock, etc.

S: Damn that was thorough! I feel like you've thought about that in the past! And on to the question that's on everyone's mind: imagine the Beastie Boys became presidents of the World, and their first act was to BURN ALL MUSIC except the new 50 Cent, that song "Steal my Sunshine" by LEN, and two albums of your choosing. What two albums are we all listening to for the rest of our lives?

MtA: Speaking of the beastie boys, "Paul's Boutique" would be a good album to have on repeat. Thats a tough one 'cause I'd want different music for different occasions, but I'd say something mellow if I have to listen to it all the time.
Maybe a Bonobo album or a Lee Scratch Perry album.

S: Who's your favorite DJ to spin alongside with?

MtA: I don't have one, but I'm just stoked when I get to DJ with people who have influenced me through their style, and I bug out when they're into my shit, and I can teach them things on Serato.

Some of my favorites would be
Qbert, Nu-Mark, DJ Craze, and A-Trak.

But I like all kinds of DJ's. Ones that skratch well, good at mixing, good selection of music, etc.

S: It sounds like you don't have much 'downtime' anymore. Have you been working on a new album at all lately, or has touring and being a husband taken up all your time these days?

MtA: I've not been working on a new album, but i try to do 1 or 2 mix CD's a year.
I've been making lots of music, but just trying new sounds out and not rushing into a album,

and I've been collaborating with lots of people, like you guys for your next CD!

I skratched on 7 tracks and 2 remixes for the latest Fort Knox Five album.
I also did the skratches for All Good Funk Alliance on a superjam remix for a video game,
and have music in progress with Sharps in Edmonton,
Ill Gates in Toronto,
Neighbour in Calgary,

and DJ Breaknech, a crazy drum and bass producer in the UK.

S: As the legend goes, you got your Alien scratch techniques after an airplane you were on went through an electrical storm that may or may not have been controlled by Alien life-forms. Has it ever crossed your mind that when you flew through that cloud the Aliens maybe planted a small chip in your brain that gave you your super-scratch-powers and helped elevate your music to mind-blowing heights, eventually allowing you to create a combination of music so amazing that the head of anyone who listens to it will literally explode?
Combine that with the fact that you're playing festivals the size of small cities on the regular, and you'd have yourself a fair amount of bodies...
How do you feel about this sort of mass homicide you'd be committing? I mean, there's nothing you could really do to prevent it...

MtA: Haha, you never know!

A friend and good DJ in Saskatoon called The Gaff told me people who do repetitive things get the attention of aliens, and they focus on these people to help with the alien mission.

We only see so many things but they have crazy powers and can talk to us without us noticing.

I also talked to someone in Kelowna who knows an old woman that claims a UFO landed in her garden and John Lennon got out and waved to her.

Not sure about either of those, but you never know.

S: I'm gonna start wearing my tinfoil hat around you. On a more serious note, you're from the UK. Do you ever get angry at the fact that we're driving on the wrong side of the road over here? Do you ever drive on the left hand side to make yourself feel more at ease?

MtA: Haha I did that in Squamish last time we got back from England. I was driving on the wrong side of the road for a minute.
It gets a bit confusing.

S: Haha! That's messed up buddy! What was the first thing you ever saw or heard or experienced that made you want to play records backwards.. and then forwards.. and then backwards again?

MtA: Err, the people who first influenced me were in the UK around '89.

DJ Hype in the UK.
DJ Supreme from Hijack - UK hip-hop.

And early DMC DJ's like Cash Money,

and of course Qbert and Mix Master Mike.

S: Anything else you want to say?

MtA: I'll have a line of really good t-shirts soon, and a new mix cd any day.

Check

www.myspace.com/matthealien

for more info

S: You heard the man! Check the site, buy the merch, wear the tee, and impress all the bitches. Ohhhh yeah!
Also, prepare yourself for the release of our upcoming album, "Understanding More About Nothing Than Anybody Ever Thought Impossible or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Music", which features cuts by Mat the Alien on the Hunchback Esquire produced track "The Caper", which can be heard on Mike's myspace page.

Radd,
-Steige.


If you enjoyed this, make sure to check out our Interview With Josh Martinez about pizza, rainbows, and Satan, as well as our Interview With Ali Milner about why she's such a babe.

Is That a Thumb or a Face?

Whoa! Heads up! Someone accidentally put their face in front of the lens!

BitchWaxCoverArt. Vol 3.

Bad album covers are kinda like the people you don't really know at family reunions. They're all overdressed, and usually filled with things you don't care to hear about, but every now and then you come across a gem. Like finding a cute second cousin that's been slamming rum and cokes all day, here are a few album covers that I'd love to get inside of.
Wait, what?

Tubby Boots - Goes Topless

"For the mature minded adult" that goes to see Tubby Boots get topless.
I still can't figure out if the best thing about this photo is the angry monkey on his (her?) purple pants, the pancake-sized-nipple-tassels, or the fact that the signature is worn out in a way that means this album was probably looked at more than once.
I guess the gladiator hat and the micro-bacteria-patterned window curtains are pretty rad too.

Stryken - First Strike

"Seriously guys. Mini skirts are in. Knee pads are in. And downhill mountain bike armor is going to make a come-back like nobody's business!"

Swamp Dogg - Rat On

"Yo Swamp Dogg, I heard you got an album coming out! Right on!"
"Yeahhhh man! Rat on, rat on, rat on!"

Birthcontrol - Believe in the Pill

Aw man! Who threw out a pair of perfectly good shades! And there's like, half an egg-salad-sandwich in there! C'mon guys!

Eulenspygel - 2

What kind of music could this amazing record sleeve possibly hold inside?
I'm either gonna have to go with some sort of Euro death metal, or 'Calming Sounds of the Sea'.

-Steige.


Want to see more bad album art? Check out BitchWaxCoverArt Vol. 1, or BitchWaxCoverArt Vol. 2! Or read our hilarious Interview With Jiminy!

Umbilical Chords.

"Oh God! Not Neil Diamond!!"

Jan. 22 - Weekly Artist Interview - Taka Sudo

Taka Sudo is the artist that we're going to hold personally responsible if our new album doesn't sell more than three-billion copies.
It's fun and easy to judge a book by its cover, (much to the dismay of our grade-school teachers -- that we probably learned to ignore by judging them by their covers, which were usually old and wrinkly,) which is why we got the amazing local art-smith of TiFdyL.com to design the art that will be printed on the jacket that will hold the record that will have pressed into it the 13 new Animal Nation songs that will ultimately be our new album, entitled "Understanding More About Nothing Than Anybody Ever Thought Impossible or: How I Learned to Stop Worrying and Love the Music".
In the following interview I didn't ask Taka why he left his home in Japan for a life in Canada, and I didn't ask him how he finds learning English as a second language. Nor did I ask him about his thoughts on the recent economic downturn.
In fact, everything I asked him was pretty much really stupid.


Steige: If dragons were real, and they were burning down all the art supply stores in all the world, and you could only save two mediums to work with, what two mediums would you save? (ie - acrylic, and grape juice.)

Taka Sudo: That's cool!! Acrylic and Anesthesia Gun. I'd paint on dragons!

S: I notice you use newspaper bits in a lot of your art. Do you ever slip in hidden messages? I noticed an article about "never being too old to go back to school" on the album art you made for us. Are you trying to tell us something?

TS: I didn't even noticed "never being too old to go back to school" article. But that's nice article.Newspaper has lots kind of emotions in it. Good news, bad news, love, hate, bias, etc etc...That look so beautiful to me. So I like to use newspaper to make art.

S: What inspires you as an artist? What inspires you as a person?

TS: Glamorous people with amazing creativity from all over the world whom I've ever met. This is my inspiration. Animal Nation's music is of course so inspiring!! Can't wait your new CD!!!

S: Do you have any super powers?

TS: When I'm drunk.

S: Your images are pretty abstract and out there. Do you ever consume anything that might change the way you think to help you with the creative process?

TS: Coffee!

S: Maybe you're naturally quirky. Maybe taking drugs would turn you normal. I bet if you started doing enough smack you could get a business degree or become a doctor or something! Have you ever used the internet to trick babes into making out with you?

TS: No. I mean "not yet".

S: If you found out that your entire life, and everything you've ever known has all been a dream, would you want to wake up?

TS: Yeah I wake up! Real world is always much much more beautiful than dream, hallucination, religion or anything.

S: That's great.
Head over to TiFdyL.com to book Taka for a live arting at your Bar Mitzvah or 3rd wedding today!




If you liked this make sure to check out our Interview With Mat the Alien, or our hilarious Interview With Ali Milner! Don't feel like reading? Check out The Googly Eye Project!

Marley & Me - A Synopsys.

Hahahahahaha!
I hope whoever did this was a girl, because I just fell in love with them.

-S.

The NolteMex.

This is amazing! I guess Capital One was offering personalized credit cards, and someone managed to slip Nick Nolte's infamous mugshot pic through the screeners.
The bank quickly realized their mistake, and sent him a letter asking him to return the card in exchange for $50, and the ability to keep using his Capitol One account. I don't know if I'd be so quick to return it. $50?? I think the "WTF" face you'd get from anyone you showed it to would be worth $50.
Check out the full story HERE.



How do I get one of these?!

-S.

Jan. 15 - Weekly Artist Interview - The Red Fox

We had the pleasure of working with The Red Fox on our last album, TimeZone. He did the chorus and the middle verse to the track 'History'. Basically, we made history together. Since then he's been busier than a worker-bee working double-overtime at the hive on his own instrumental album, releasing soon under the moniker 'Spent Balloons', a freshly-dropped concept album with a song for each of the seven sins, appropriately titled 'Seven Sins', as well as dealing with the in's and out's of working a lame job just to afford enough green to smoke away the fact that he works a lame job.
Hearing Red Fox for the first time can be slightly confusing. I remember likening his style to the Beach Boys' classic album 'Pet Sounds', in the sense that while his smooth delivery and soft voice may seem pleasing and upbeat at first, his lyrical content is usually something of the opposite. Like listening to the beautiful harmonies on 'Sloop John B', then actually listening to the words, "This is the worst trip I've ever been on." Red Fox smashes happy into sad, and pity into laughter. Never have I heard a pessimist rip on everything around them so pleasantly.
...And you know that anyone with a huge neck-tat of their stage name has got to be in it for the long-haul.
Here's what The Red Fox had to say about things, stuff.

Click HERE to bring up his Myspace in a separate window so you can listen to, and read, the Red Fox at the very same time. Whoa.



Steige: What 2 tapes are getting the most play in your Walkman right now?
Red Fox: MURS - Murs For President
GRANDPA-J ® & The Red Fox - Seven Sins

S: Why?
RF: Well I've been knocking the MURS album cause it's good and I was waiting for a long time to hear how his major label debut would come out. I just really like his honesty and what he's bringing to the table. Seven Sins I'm listening to because I'm a self-centered egotistical prick. Ok?

S: I would have assumed you're heavy into MURS for the same reason. What's the worst job you've done?
RF: Graveyard shift at a gas station in the hood. People would come up with all kinds of shit out there! Crack head prostitutes would offer me services for cigarettes, the police would straight beat up fools in front of my window, cats tried buying 50 cent bags of chips with fake $100 bills... All kinds of shit. I mean the bulletproof window had bullet holes in it! Me and my homies used to just hot box the inside and eat everything in the store like fuck it! I eventually got fired needless to say...

S: How do you relax?
RF: I don't.

S: Where does the name 'Red Fox' come from?
RF: Sanford & Sons. Duh!
You need to wash yo stankin' ass!

S: What is the worst thing anyone's said to you?
RF: The worst shit probably comes from within. Everything else I can deal with... But me? I'm a problem. I hate myself so good!

S: Do you prefer performing live, or recording songs in the studio?
RF: It's a different kind of thing. I can't really compare the two. I can say that performing live with the crowd screaming and everybody going nuts is probably the bigger high but it's so short lived. When you record a song it becomes a part of your life and that feeling stays with you forever. I used to prefer the studio hands down but once you take these little pieces of yourself onto a stage they take on a whole new life and become something else. I really just love all of this shit. It means everything to me.

S: Everyone really enjoyed the track you did with us for our TimeZone album, 'History', but it seems like you've progressed again in your latest work, the concept album 'Seven Sins'. What can we expect next from the Red Fox?
RF: We made history! Say it! Let's see, what am I working on right now...
The official release of my instrumental album Spent Balloons.
A concept project based completely on Harry Potter themes with producer The Tom Riddle Experiment. Seriously.
Another instrumental album using all Elliot Smith samples.
My sophomore masterpiece album The Red Scare which will rule the shit out of 2009. I really think people are gonna love this one. It should be major!

S: The Red Scare? I'm intrigued. Consider it pre-sold. Anything else you want to say?
RF: Yeah. Fuck the police. And thanks for putting me on your album and doing this interview. You guys are awesome and I love doing anything I can with y'all!

S: Thank you! We'll make sure to send you a copy of our new album, 'Understanding More About Nothing Than Anybody Ever Thought Impossible' as soon as it's done.
This one, unfortunately, doesn't feature Red Fox, but it does have a really really long title! Keep an eye out for it, as well as for Fox's new album, 'The Red Scare', coming in 2009.
Keep 'er easy.

-Steige


Enjoy this? Make sure to check out our Interview With Hunchback Esquire, or either of the hilarious interviews we did with Ali Milner, or Jiminy!

BitchWaxCoverArt. Vol 2.

I took a look around and it turns out there are all sorts of horrible album covers out there! I feel so ignorant to the album cover brutality that occurs in the world!
Here's a few more albums to add to the "Groups that spent more time working on their music than the package that their music would be wrapped in" category.
That's like working on becoming a better person, when you could very well be spending that time at the gym bulking up.
Ladies love it when you can benchpress their personality.

The Three Musket-Tears - Songs for my Baby

"Hey Americaaa!! You like our record!? You sign us, yes?! We are use Tamborine men! Just like you like!"

Abba - Gracias Por La Musica

Okay, we get it. You're European and you sleep with each other's wifes, and wear their clothes, and grow your chest hair real long, but why do you have to look so damn happy doing it? Showoffs.

John Bult - Julie's Sixteenth Birthday

"Julie, I think it's about time you find out... your mom is actually your sister... and your mom."

Bob Thomas - 7 Places to Hang a Hat

I wonder how many photos they took before they told Bob to put down the guitar and ask his girlfriend if she'd get naked for $50.
"Seriously Bob. We've been doing this for years. We KNOW what sells records, and naked chicks awkwardly petting rabbits definitely sells records."

Dick Hyman & Mary Mayo - Moon Gas

I don't even need to hear this record to know that I'm in love with it. Dick Hyman?! Mary Mayo!? Moon Gas?!! I have a feeling that this record probably sounds like what jumping on the moon feels like. Which, I would imagine, probably feels like grape soda tastes after spending two weeks in the desert without water.
Yeah, this record sounds like dehydration acts when it's hungover off tequila and cheap hookers.
Moon Gas.

-Steige.

Like this? Check out more bad album covers on BitchWaxCoverArt Vol.1, or BitchWaxCoverArt Vol. 3! Or watch everyday inanimate objects come to life in The Googly Eye Project!